Once You Raise Your Standards, You Can't Go Back

What happens when you become the business owner who says, "No, I've got boundaries and I stick to them. I've got standards and I've raised them. I'm willing to have the hard conversations"? On this week's Biz Besties episode, we talked about the thing nobody warns you about: once you raise your standards, you cannot go back to the version of your business that tolerated less.

🎧 Prefer to listen? This post began as Ep 633 of the My Aligned Purpose podcast. Listen on Apple Podcasts or listen on Spotify.

Why raising your standards means you can't go back

When you set a new standard for yourself as a human, and especially as a business owner, it gets really hard not to see what you used to put up with. The conversations you used to accept. The passive-aggressive comments. The criticism. The "I'll just lower my price for these people" decision. Once you raise the bar and go all in on the new standard, you just know.

Kaila described it as a feeling in your body. When you try to go back, you feel it immediately: "Ugh, I have to get out of here right now. This is so not aligned." We know this happens for everyone because it is just energy. You feel expansive, and then you step into a call or a situation that leaves you contracted, and your whole system says no.

We also want to say this with compassion: none of us know what we don't know. You have to experience the new standard to realize, "Oh, I didn't know it could feel this good." And once you do know, it becomes your responsibility as a business owner to decide you are not going back. You learned how to set better boundaries, have tough conversations, manage your calendar, ask for the sale and raise your prices. That is a choice you make.

Your income standard is a business standard

Kaila said something in this episode that we want every woman business owner to hear. If your current standard is "I don't make very much money, I can't pay my bills consistently, and I'm not sure this is going to pan out," then that is your standard, even if you tell yourself you don't want it.

The way out, she shared, is learning to receive money. Set up your offer, receive money on a consistent basis, and show yourself it is okay to make money, even if it is not a huge amount at first. Go with whatever your nervous system can handle. Then start gathering proof. Instead of telling yourself you are not making money and couldn't handle it if you did, which is a story based in the past, notice the ways you are making money right now and handling it just fine.

Six and a half years into My Aligned Purpose, our own money standards have changed completely. In the early days we paid ourselves a profit every month, but the amount was not always big. Now there is no way we accept less than $10,000 a month each. That is our floor, and we keep raising it. We could probably double what we pay ourselves if we stopped investing in coaching, mastermind, team and travel, but we know the power of mentorship and being in the right rooms. We have also always run on referrals and sometimes affiliates rather than ads. We are not opposed to ads in the future. It is simply how we operate now, and we prioritize paying ourselves a wage that feels really good while still stretching the business.

Client, delegation and leadership standards that changed everything

Standards show up well beyond money. When we first launched Aligned CEO Method, every new member felt like a celebration. It did not take long to learn that running a mastermind with people who were not serious about running their business did not work. Some wanted generalized life coaching. Some wanted us to run on the treadmill for them. Some could never press post on Instagram. It was a great learning experience, and now we can lovingly say, "We don't think you'd be a fit right now, but check back after you grow your business." We feel so good about that standard.

Kaila's biggest upgrade was delegation. She used to be nervous to delegate, and the soft version of her that said "whatever you want to do is fine" was not working. Now she has to remember to say please and thank you, because what needs to be done is so clear to her. With a thousand balls in the air, from events to the mastermind to lead magnets to the podcast, that confidence is what keeps the whole business running.

Stop being an imposter to your own business

When Kaila said that soft version of her was not who she really is, it opened up a bigger conversation. How many of you are posting like someone else, writing a sales page that sounds like another sales page, or hosting a call in a style that is not really you?

Here is our take on imposter syndrome, and we say this with love: when people feel like an imposter, it is often because they are not being themselves. If you were confidently being authentic, you would not feel like an imposter, because you would feel like you. If you are trying to be an imposter to the person you are comparing yourself to, this is your pause. Take off the mask, the pretending and the people pleasing, and decide today to put that version of you down.

Get in a room where the standard is higher than yours

Kaila's reminder was simple and a little uncomfortable: you will stay with your old standards if you only hang out with people who have them. She told a story about spending time with another family where the way people treated their bodies was well below her own standard for her health, and she felt it right away. Business works the same way. Spend time with people who say "I have a side hustle and don't look at my Instagram," and that becomes normal. Spend time with people who say "I'm building this business, I'm serving people, and I'm going to share my story," and a different standard becomes normal.

That is why we are inviting you into a room where the standard is high. Join us November 4th, 5th and 6th at 12:00 PM Pacific (3:00 PM Eastern) for our free three-day event on making 2027 your most profitable year yet. We will help you plan 2027 and identify where your standards need to rise, with plenty of mindset work and the same spreadsheet we use with Aligned CEOs to plan launches, collaborations, social media and your CEO dashboard. Sign up at myalignedpurpose.com/2027. Replays will be available, but come live if you can, because we ask everyone to share what they have for sale and who they want to be connected to. We do not gatekeep, and your next client could be in the room.

Not sure where your biggest business block is? Take the free My Aligned Purpose quiz to find out what kind of CEO you are growing into. Get our weekly insights in the newsletter, and when you are ready for the room where the standard is high, explore the Aligned CEO Method.